A male baby is forced to make a choice at birth: join the patriarchy, or die. Why die? Because there is no other option.
Women have no idea about the extreme pain of the sacrifice of one's self, vision, future, if a man chooses to join the patriarchy.
Some men try to de-masculate themselves in whatever way they can.
Some mothers try to help them... What other choice does a woman have? Either she can destroy the boy with ridicule and not so subtle aggression, fear, hatred, and revenge. Or she can over coddle him into being a 'nice boy', someone who would never do to a woman what so many men have done to her.
As a boy, you know which path your mother chose.
Having to choose to join the patriarchy or die causes such immense pain that many babies choose to die rather than endure giving up their life plan and live the false identity of being a patriarch in the patriarchy. Doctors call it 'sudden infant death syndrome' (SIDS). Now we know more about what is really going on.
Entering the patriarchy means to leave everything behind, gifts, treasures, your Pearl, your Bright Principles, your Archetypal Lineage, and then try to fit in. Be like the other 'men'. Abandon your desire for Authentic Adulthood Initiatory Processes. Play your role in the mafia. Fighting to rise up in the command-and-control patriarchal hierarchies in society, being part of the problem on planet Earth, abandoning any hope of being part of the changes that are so needed.
By leaving behind everything of value you become small enough to fit through the 'Eye Of The Needle' and emerge on the patriarchy side as a naked and powerless victim trying to fight for position and power in a despicable "I win, you lose", winner-takes-all, "Whoever dies with the most toys, wins," survival game. Since it happened so fast at birth, you forget for a long time that anything else is possible.
Perhaps after decades you grow weary of being so adaptive, being so numb, being so disconnected. If you do not die of addictions, diseases, or suicide, your heart may cry out regardless of the consequences. You may continue to suppress its unheard and unfelt pains, or you may start asking questions that none of your friends have answers to. This can bring you to the edge of modern culture. Only at its edge can you see that something else is possible.
You could start over. You could go back to zero, pick up what you dropped at birth, help create something besides capitalist patriarchal empire on Earth. But men cannot exit the patriarchy except by the same way they got in: through the Eye Of The Needle. This means dropping everything the patriarchy has given you: position, wealth, possessions, fame, trophies, rewards... going back to the naked baby with nothing, returning to your origins and beginning again.
Nothing else will be true. No one can do it for you. Will you do it?
We will see.